I'm exited!!!

I was down, sad and anxious. I have my heart full of luv and passion, eager to share with someone. I wanna take care of a women luv n respect her, but unfortunately what I wanted turned down to be a full BS, and dat made me sad. My I promised not to change my way, I kept my goal knowing dat one day she would came.

It seems like she has arrived :)

It all started from "likes" in Instagram :) oh yeah social network. Every day I had likes from her, and dat called my eyes, n curiosity. So today I wassup her and really enjoyed chatting with her.

Although she's 24 but seems very mature(hope not mistaken). She has a kid, and a job :) 

We spoke for about all day...

Her name is Yanessy 

Home sweet home

Today I gave one step in getting my crib. I found a good place and made the payment for 4 months. I now have ahead another fight to find 8k and settle the deal for one year. I'm happy, although I wanted it to be mine. 

Still I have other pending issues to resolve like the payment of jeep, Murapa and BESA loan.

I hope this month to close few of the bills I got. I will cool down Fabio and ask him for some more time. I planning to pay some with the loan from BAI. 

Next step will be to start doing some arrangements on the flat, like changing the tiles, paint, redo d doors and windows, change the lockers, etc etc. them will have to think about the furniture, but for now I will still use my old bed and closet to keep myself installed.

Thank you Father.

Crib

Found a crib @ corea. The location is not the best but the house is good. Rent will be 800 p month, so it's good. I need to pay now 6months 4800 and start moving coz I can't stand no more at mom place. I'm feeling much better than last week my heart is starting to wake up and rebuild it self. I'm trying to recover D back to me, and I hope she still likes me.

Bye

Angustia

Sinto-me angustiado c o coração apertado, c o peito xeio d amor p amar, confuso, perdido... 

N sei o k fazer. Só sei k sonho c um novo dia, diferente deste. Procuro soluções. Minha alma parece flutuar dentro da lua.  

Preciso encontrar rápido uma solução pk n suporto mais isso... N sei n sei n sei, só sei k kero ser feliz

Future

I received today a job offer from COP. I feel pleased for that, but not happy with the offer. I feel I can have more based on my experience and will try to rise it to 6k

Still...

I'm still collecting the pieces of my broken heart. Last night was bad, it hurts bad, and its a challenge I have to face to put my mind ahead of my feelings. The picture is clear and without a doubt I know know she's dating someone else and all I've to do is accept it and move on. I now I can do it

You can't turn a hoe into a house wife

Words of wisdom those ones. She's a hoe and I was dreaming in turning her into a house wife! WTF... My friends comment on her behavior. Man I must take this shit out of mind and move on...

Changes

Once again I'm facing though times maybe due to trusting to much in human being. It's like I'm tasting all I've done to my past dudes. I was feeling confident and happy coz I felt I was living luv sharin dreams and life plans, but suddenly all fall down. I'm still collectin pieces of my broken heart tryin to find answers to questions I already know...she with someone else, and I'm takin to long to accept dat. I need to find strength e on with my life, persist in looking for happiness somewhere else. It's never easy specially when u are 40-36 and heart full of luv to share. I'm kind of lost trying to compose myself and see what's important to me. Got to move on 4 real and leave all behind. 

From now on ill try to recover trust I lost from Dei and dedicate myself to her. I now realize she's d only one right now dat I can stil dream of, apart from all d shit she has. God give strength and faith dat better days are still to come...